


Going Green

by SteamyLego (RoakAssault)



Series: Let's Get Andrew and Neil High Since I Can't Right Now [2]
Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Cute, Exy, Exy (All For The Game), Fluff, In Universe, Kissing, M/M, Post-Canon, Recreational Drug Use, Weed, edibles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-07
Updated: 2020-08-07
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:20:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25762786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoakAssault/pseuds/SteamyLego
Summary: Neil eats an edible on accident- again- but this time before an exy match so everyone gets to see how useless he is while under the influence of mary jane.see also: Andrew gets possessive when jealous
Relationships: Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard
Series: Let's Get Andrew and Neil High Since I Can't Right Now [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1868845
Comments: 20
Kudos: 353





	Going Green

Neil burst through the doors and stormed away from Burton Hall. He was running late. His Intermediate Calculus midterm had started almost 45 minutes after it was supposed to because of a problem with the copier and there had been an entire gymnasium’s worth of students in the line to wait behind before he could turn in his exam. It was _infuriating_ and ate into an hour and thirty-five minutes of the two hours early he was _supposed_ to be to the foxhole court before the team left for USC-Columbia for their game that-. 

‘ _Breathe_ ,’ he told himself. This is what the two hours were for. They would still make it on time and everything would be alright. 

He would’ve shoved his way to the front of the line or made a bigger deal about everything- God knows he had no problem doing that- but he was being more cautious about acting out lately. After the latest press-related outburst, where Neil said something about how the reporter who asked if he was pursuing cosmetic reconstruction surgery for his facial scars could use some work himself (though who could remember for sure), he’d yet again come under fire by his own team for misbehaving. Save for Andrew, of course who just thought it was funny. 

This wasn’t anything new, either, but the difference this time was that Kevin said something that Neil couldn’t get out of his head. 

“You know, you’re not off the hook yet. You’ll have to get signed after you’re done here or it’s all over,” Kevin had said in scathing French. “It doesn’t matter how good you are- pro teams have plenty of great strikers _without_ attitude problems and awful public reputations to choose from. Why do you think I just smile and nod?”

He didn’t know if it was necessarily true, but it got under his skin. And he wasn’t so stubborn that he’d die on the sword of pettiness when he’d risked so much to get where he was now. Even if he got a few rare smiles from Andrew for the comebacks, it wouldn't be worth it if in a couple years he couldn’t be around to see them anymore. 

So, he was on his best behavior- he’d be Palmetto State’s sweetheart if he had to, dammit. He’d spent his whole life switching between different identities- this was nothing. Though the bite would be hard, he could grit his teeth. Waiting in line to turn in his exam behind students who were infuriatingly calm while he was screaming fiery hell on the inside proved that much. 

He balanced his backpack on his shoulder, pulling out his cellphone and powering it on. A banner telling him he had 11 missed calls, followed by one telling him of 23 new messages, flashed on the screen. He clicked the most recent contact and held the phone up to his ear. The answer was almost immediate. 

“Do I have to have to notify the FBI that you’ve gone missing again?” Wymack barked in lieu of a hello.

“I’m on my way now. About 10 minutes.”

“And I hope there’s a good reason you weren’t saying that an hour ago? We could barely keep your guard dog from searching for you himself.”

“My exam went way over. I’m sorry- we had to put our phones away before I knew what was happening.”

“Well,” Wymack said, his concerned anger giving a bit, “I better see you here in 9 minutes then. I swear- I’ll start Jack if you make me.”

Neil sighed and closed his phone. If that threat wasn’t all the motivation he’d ever need…

He pushed his fast-walk to a light jog and started through Fox Plaza, his mind only on getting to the court. He almost ran into a few different bodies and, only as he was spewing out his fourth apology, realized there was some kind of club fair crowding the space. Tables lined the sides of the wide path and students were scattered everywhere. _Perfect timing_. Neil just focused on dodging people and getting through the crowd. 

“Dude, watch out!” Neil barely managed to jump out of the way of the skateboarder that was barreling through the crowded, slightly sloped square. The motion caused him to fall right into one of the flimsy student tables, knocking the thing over and his butt landing on hard brick. 

“Fuck,” he groaned, checking through each part of his body to make sure nothing was too hurt. Thankfully, the brief assessment came back clear. 

“Are you alright?” a voice asked from behind him. He looked over and began to rise slowly, worry giving way to embarrassment from taking a spill through a fold-out table. The guy who had been sitting at the table- a short, skinny dude with long hair in a man bun and a scraggly goatee- had stood up and cleared the way backwards as Neil fell. He stepped back towards him and held out a hand to help him up. 

“Yeah,” Neil said, ready to take off again once he was on his feet. Though, when he noticed the number of people looking his way in front of the collapsed table with its contents all over the ground as he sported bright white and orange on his jersey, he paused. _Palmetto State’s sweetheart_ , he reminded himself. 

So, he promptly grabbed on to a side of the overturned table and helped the other student right it. He then began grabbing at the various wrapped baked goods and paper pamphlets strewn all over the ground. It didn’t take long to put everything back together, but to Neil, who had a court to get to, it felt like an eternity. 

“Thanks, man,” the other man smiled at Neil. 

“No problem,” Neil assured, hearing a ticking clock in his head. Just as he was turning away, another question stopped him.

“Oh! You’re on our exy team, right?” 

“Yeah,” Neil said with a tight smile, deciding that being polite might have been worse than yakuza-grade torture. 

“Nice,” the man said, still smiling. Neil nodded, not quite sure what to say.

“Well, thanks for your help and good luck on your game tonight. I’ll be sure to watch,” he said. Neil thanked him and took a moment to glance at the table- Climate Change Resistance- and the jar of money on the table. 

He dug through his pocket and pulled out a $1, dropping it in, hoping it would make up for leaving so suddenly after causing a scene. 

“Thanks!” the man called out, flicking his eyes over Neil. “I’ll see you around?”

Neil nodded and said, “See you,” before turning to start back up the hill. 

“Here- Think fast!” the man called out, and Neil instinctively turned to catch the small object thrown his way- a seran-wrapped granola bar. He shoved the thing in his backpack pocket and waved, now running to make up for the time and to avoid any more stalls. 

He made it to the court with 2 minutes to spare- well, really no minutes to spare- and met his team’s relieved faces when he bursted into the team’s meeting room. 

“Cutting it close,” Jack said from the floor in front of one of the couches with a smirk. Neil dropped his bag at Andrew’s side, who gave him a once over, and ignored the brooding first-year’s comment. He spotted his equipment bag next to Andrew’s, packed and ready to go, and mouthed a thank you as he plopped down next to him. Dan was stood at the front of the room, reading off notes about the team’s starting lineup for tonight.

He felt fingers pinch his ear and was pulled so he met Andrew’s stare, which was a mix of pissed and concerned. He didn’t say anything, his expression asking the questions for him. 

“The test went way over- I’m sorry,” Neil said, loud enough that his other teammates could hear as well.

Andrew pushed his face back forward and leaned back into the couch, shoving his print out with the opponents’ stats into Neil’s lap. He looked it over but knew that he’d already memorized everything about the opposing team that he needed to. 

“Glad you made it, Neil, though I will never understand your choice in majors,” Dan said, looking back down at her paper.

Before she could add anything else, Wymack came through the door, followed by Kevin, and clapped his hands together, which was fox for ‘the equipment is loaded onto the bus’. His eyes landed on Neil and he nodded.

“All ready to go?” he aimed at Dan.

“Just about,” Dan smiled, folding the paper and pocketing it. “Now that our resident lost boy has returned, and if everyone is sure they have their white jerseys…,” she paused, waiting for everyone to think it over, “let’s move!”

All at once, the foxes jumped into action, grabbing their bags and filing out of the meeting room. “You do kind of look like Peter Pan,” Nicky said at Neil’s left. Neil sighed deeply, fearing yet another nickname from his teammates. He just said nothing in response and hoped it wouldn’t catch on.

Though Neil usually opted for the front of the bus to talk the first-years’ ears off about their opponents, he went straight to the back today. He felt bad for removing himself after being so late but he needed sleep after that fucking test and all the stress it caused him- USC-Columbia wasn’t exactly a team they had to over-prepare for, either. So, with Andrew reading silently next to him, he rested his face against the window and slept the short hour to the away court.

He woke up to a gentle tug of his coat’s collar, the sun low in the horizon a pleasant sight to wake up to. He sat up and glanced over at Andrew, who now had his eyes trained on the small screen suspended from the bus ceiling, though the only sound he could hear was the faint discussion between a few foxes closer to the front. 

The movie was something animated that Neil didn’t recognize- he’d only been exposed to Matt’s DVD collection for a few months at this point and he still didn’t really pay that close of attention when they had movie nights together. The intensity that Andrew was watching it with, though, was way more interesting to him than the plot anyway. 

“How close?” he asked

“About 7 minutes.” 

Neil nodded and let his mind drift as he stared up at the screen. He started running checklists in his mind. The test had really thrown him off his usual pre-game schedule and it made him feel like he was forgetting something. He was wearing his away jersey; he trusted Andrew to pack what he needed; he even brought his backpack and homework along. 

He gazed out at the approaching city, gas stations and chain restaurants lighting up the early night. Everything should be-

_Oh, shit._

Passing a pair of golden arches, he suddenly realized the gnawing in his stomach was definitely not from nerves. 

The test had completely cut into his dinner plans and eating had slipped his mind altogether. He did have a big lunch, but that was _hours_ ago now and it was too close to serve now to eat anything big, not that he’d have anywhere to get it. Fuck. 

At least tonight’s game wouldn’t be that hard, he thought. He wouldn’t have to push it. He’d certainly put himself through worse, anyways. He was fine. 

Oh, Andrew would be so mad about every part of that thought process. 

Before he could figure out a better solution, the bus came to a halt and the animated movie froze. Neil watched his teammates begin shuffling around and Kevin pop up at the front. With a brunt “get moving,” the team was off the bus and officially on USC-Columbia Gamecock turf. 

Warm-ups went by quickly. Neil got so lost in the repetitive drills that he was able to forget about his hunger- for the most part. In the last five minutes, though, he felt the crash in energy and knew he had nothing to blame but his blood sugar. He felt Andrew’s judging stare as he easily blocked Neil’s practice shots and Kevin’s angry yells told him the goalie wasn’t the only one to take notice. 

He tried to shake it off as the team chattered back towards the locker rooms and team meeting room, but it was hard. He had a lot of stamina and he _had_ been through worse but he’d gotten his body used to _not_ doing that- self-care or something like that. The missing meal was hitting him a lot harder than he thought it would.

He sat down in the team room on one of the cold metal chairs and held his face with his hands as the team waited for Wymack to join them for a pre-game pep talk. It didn’t do much but make him more aware of how light-headed he was. He sighed sat back up, suddenly noticing the glare piercing into him from the side. 

He turned to see Andrew with a calculating look on his face. 

“What?” Neil asked. 

Andrew looked him over a moment more. “You’re flushed,” he said. “More than usual.”

Neil looked back at him, not really able to deny anything, but not wanting to admit his dilemma with no real solution. Of course, this is when his stomach decided to give him away with a growl so loud it cut through the fox’s pregame buzz. 

Andrew’s look darkened into something of a concerned but _very_ disappointed parent. “Did you eat dinner?”

Neil looked away, properly intimidated. “I was going to-” 

Before he could explain, Andrew angrily pulled him by the arm from the team room and towards their bags in the locker room, leaving the rest of the team behind in confused silence. 

Neil stood beside the bench quietly as Andrew tore into his own bag, pulling out a banana and a bag of small cookies. He then moved to frisking down Nicky’s bag, where he found an apple, and then Aaron’s, where he found nothing. 

Neil felt even worse when he started moving to the other teammates’ bags and remembered he wasn’t empty handed. “Here,” he said to Andrew, drawing his angry stare as he fished the granola bar from his backpack, failing to mention that he’d only gotten it by chance. Andrew’s glare only got angrier. 

He stood back up and pointed to the spread they’d pieced together. “Eat.”

“Drew, it’s too close to the start-”

“Your lack of self-preservation was cute at first but at this point it’s just infuriating. Eat.”

Neil couldn’t help but smile. “It was cute at first?”

Andrew didn’t smile back and instead just stared at Neil until he finally gave in and unwrapped the bar in his hands and took a bite. Andrew picked the other snacks up from the bench and shoved them into Neil’s open hand. 

“A side cramp is better than fainting under your costume’s weight,” he stated before turning back towards the meeting room. Neil rolled his eyes because he knew Andrew was right. 

Wymack eyed the two and Neil’s armful of snacks as they reentered the room but didn’t bother with asking any questions. 

“Like I was saying,” he started as they found their seats, “Columbia has been having a pretty weak season- their defense is normally not half bad but the new line up has been having some trouble with chemistry and it shows. Now, use this to your advantage rather than an excuse to take it easy. Do what they can’t do and keep the rhythm. A point gap in the first half won’t be a problem- that means some of you will be seeing your first minutes of play on a college court tonight. Take advantage of tonight and do what we know you can do. Sound good?”

The team let out a collective noise of affirmation. Neil was suddenly aware of how grateful he was at the prospect of not playing a full game. 

He managed to choke down the granola bar most of the banana before it was time to head back out to the court, sneaking the cookies and apple back into his bag on the way while Andrew wasn’t looking. As they waited by the court and he was on his last bite of the fruit, Kevin stared at him like he wanted to say something but didn’t. Sometimes, it was really nice that he was scared of Andrew.

With his stomach barely settled, Neil heard the announcer begin calling the home team onto the court by name, number and position. And, though he never ate this close to a game’s start, he couldn’t deny that he had a lot more energy now than he had during warm ups. 

As the team stood in their starting positions, he turned around to look at Andrew, wanting a way to show him the intervention was appreciated. Though they couldn’t see each other’s faces, Neil knew he noticed him by the dismissive hand wave that told him to turn back around. He was smiling all the way through the first shot on defense. 

The game went by as predicted, the foxes taking a fierce 5-1 lead with 10 minutes left in the half- the only reason they’d scored at all had been because of Wymack’s merciful substitution of Andrew by the freshman rookie who, Neil had to admit, was really holding her own. USC-Columbia, on the other hand, was clearly growing frustrated with the growing point gap, more and more fights breaking out between calls made by the refs. 

Neil was watching at a distance, waiting to step in, as a Columbia backliner argued over a yellow card (that was about to turn into a red card, Neil thought), when his brain started to spin a bit. The space in his helmet seemed a lot smaller than it had before and his breathing was the only thing he could hear. He blinked and tried to focus but the game seemed... far away.

He barely registered the whistle signaling the start of the next play and stood in place trying to locate his mark that had slipped his line of sight. The game continued towards the fox’s goal, and felt relief as he saw Kevin staying back up the court with him, letting defense handle the situation. 

And soon enough, they did, Nicky passing the ball backwards to the goalie- Samsa- who smashed the ball up the court and into the right wall. As it bounced, Neil realized that the pass was to him. 

He tried to react to catch it in time, but he was doubtful as he moved that it would work out like that. He was so focused on the pass that the idea of the other team slipped his mind completely and his opposing mark, who had about 7 inches on him, barreled into his side. Neil fell hard on the ground, his racket popping out of his hand at the force. 

The game immediately stopped with the sounds of frantic whistles and Neil’s mark rolled off of him. Body checks were not uncommon in exy, but the circumstances were a bit too presumptuous, so the mark was fouled immediately. Though, as he stared up at the court lights and listened to the dull roar of the crowd outside, the play was the furthest thing from Neil’s mind. 

“Neil?” His teammates calling his name out of concern helped him orient himself- ‘Oh, I’m on the _ground_ ’- but sitting up felt like a foreign motion that he could barely manage to get through. 

He watched the grating of his helmet move in front of his eyes as the whole thing was lifted off his head and his bleary eyes met Dan’s concerned face. “Hey, you alright?” she asked, placing a careful hand on his shoulder. “Do you need Abby?”

 _Abby_. Neil glanced around the court, furrowing his brows as he tried to see the outline of the team’s nurse that he knew was waiting behind the glass door. He assessed himself, finding that, not only were there no debilitating injuries from the spill, but he actually felt no pain _at all_. Huh. 

He shook his head at Dan. “I’m fine,” he said, his voice raspy as he reached for his helmet. Dan pulled it away from him, ignoring Neil and assessing him for herself. 

Neil realized what he’d said and shook his head, cracking a smile. “No, no- not like that. I… nothing hurts,” he clarified, shrugging. 

Dan looked at the ref, who was waiting for a signal from the fox captain, and then back at Neil. “You don’t… seem like yourself. I think Abby should check for a concussion.”

Neil looked down and thought about it. He couldn’t argue that he wasn’t feeling normal, but it wasn’t the collision that started it. He was just low energy- _tired_. 

“I didn’t eat dinner,” he explained to Dan, whose concerned expression deepened further. 

“You…,” she said, taking in his words. “Neil, I don’t…,” she trailed off. She looked his face over once more, her mouth in a frown. 

In a decisive motion, she shook her head at the ref, who gave a long whistle blow signaling that Neil was moving out of the game. 

Neil reached at Dan to argue, and she pulled him to his feet. “Dan, I can still play,” he said, not quite believing himself as he stumbled his way back to the door, Dan pushing him along. He wasn’t sure if her firm hold was out of support or a means of forcing him off the court. 

“Just want to make sure,” she said in a soft voice as the door opened, letting in the crowd’s scattered noise and where Jack was waiting with a smug look. 

Neil glared at him as he passed, stepping reluctantly into the team’s box. 

“Check for a concussion,” the team captain ordered. Neil glanced backwards at Dan as she handed him off to Abby, the door closing as the game resumed. 

“I am… I’m okay,” Neil tried to say in a convincing tone as he was sat on the edge of the bench by the courtside. 

“Can you tell me what happened right before you fell,” Abby responded, rifling through her bag. 

“Um, yeah,” Neil responded, as though it was obvious. “My mark, _Garcia_ ,” he started, placing emphasis on the name to prove he didn’t forget it (though he had for a second), “ran into me and… I fell.”

Abby nodded, seeming to grow more tense as she sorted through her supplies. Neil wasn’t sure why. “My head feels… it doesn’t _hurt_ ,” he reassured her. It didn’t seem to work. 

He felt a weight on the bench next to him and looked over to see _Andrew_ and was caught off guard by the ecstatic feeling wash over him. The goalie had that same worried look that Dan had on the court as he looked him over. 

“Hey, Drew,” Neil said with a smile. It did not rub off on the blonde. 

His head was turned gently back towards Abby and he squinted as a light was shined into his eyes. 

“I need to see if your pupils match,” Abby explained, moving to hold each eye open as she shone the small light. Neil pouted through it, blinking away the colors that exploded in his vision as Abby sat back with a perplexed look on her face. 

“Neil…,” she started cautiously, “have you been getting enough sleep?”

Neil furrowed his eyebrows. “Yeah… I think so,” he answered, trying to figure out the reason Abby was asking that. “Andrew is usually there, too,” he elaborated, hoping for some back up from the goalie. 

Abby just looked further concerned and Neil wasn’t really sure why before he was suddenly facing Andrew again, whose fingers were digging into his cheeks, though he couldn’t really feel them. He felt them tighten around his smile. 

“Hello,” he greeted again. Andrew narrowed his eyes at him and leaned forward with searching eyes. 

“What?” Neil said in a half-exasperated tone, not knowing why everyone kept giving him that look. Andrew stared at him in thought for a few more moments before his expression relaxed a microscopic amount as he looked like he realized something. His face then dropped to something like disappointment. 

“Neil,” Andrew started slowly, “where did you get that granola bar?”

Neil furrowed his brow and realized after a moment what Andrew was talking about. When he remembered, he laughed a little bit. “When I was coming to the court... after my test...,” he began, stopping when he realized how dry his mouth was. In a second Andrew had a water bottle to his lips, which Neil was certainly grateful for. 

“There was a club fair… thing,” he recalled with some difficulty, “and I ran into a table... BUT I was nice and helped pick it up so they gave me one of their granola bars.” He realized that Wymack had come over to see what was happening and _certainly_ hoped he heard that part about being nice. 

“Do you know what club it was for?” Andrew asked, his voice dropping a bit more. 

Neil thought hard, squinching his face. “Like… recycling? Or something like that,” he said, not exactly sure why he was being asked this either but doing his best to answer.

Andrew let out a sigh and finally loosened his grip on Neil’s face and leaned to his right to peer at Abby, who gave him a questioning look. 

“What’s up with him?” Wymack asked from them. Andrew turned to face him. 

“The environmental club likes making their bake sales extra green,” Andrew answered flatly. “It’s pot… and hopefully just that.”

“Pots… like for cooking?” Neil asked, trying to understand. 

“Jesus Christ,” Wymack sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. He looked between a dazed Neil and the court. “You keep an eye on him,” he ordered Andrew and Abby, who nodded in agreement. “We’re up by enough that he was probably coming out of the game anyways.”

“And you,” Wymack directed at Neil, who tried to stand but was held in place by Andrew. “Just… hang in there,” he said with a pinch of pity. “And no more granola bars from any student organizations.” With that, he turned his attention back to the game. 

Neil squinted at Andrew’s gaze when it returned. “What does he mean?” he asked, starting to feel even more flustered and separate from the noise surrounding him. 

“Neil,” Andrew said, bringing his hands to cup the redhead’s face again, centering him. Neil blinked blearily at him. 

“Do you remember that party last month at the high schooler’s house?”

Neil tried to focus the fragments of thoughts swirling in his head into something coherent. _Party_. Yeah, he remembered that… night. 

He began smiling at the memories, feeling the familiar yet rare urge to start giggling. “Yeah I remember,” he said, feeling his face heat up. 

Andrew rolled his eyes. “You feel now like you did that night, right?” 

Neil made himself recall the way he felt that night and realized Andrew was right. This was undoubtedly the same fuzzy, warm, helpless feeling he’d had that night. But now it was _during a game_. 

Suddenly, the conversations about the granola bar and its place of origin began to make sense. He stared blankly at Andrew as he pieced things together. 

“Oh,” he said, waiting to see Andrew’s reaction, not sure if he was in trouble or not. “I didn’t know,” he clarified. 

Andrew rolled his eyes again and rubbed his thumb over Neil’s marred cheek. “I know you didn’t, kid,” he said, dropping his hands and leaning back out of Neil’s space. “Like you would ever do anything to jeopardize your precious stick ball games.”

Neil still found it hard to believe he was off the hook. He was _high_ \- at a _game_. He turned to Abby with an apologetic look. She just smiled at him, touching his arm gently. “Let us know if you start to feel sick.”

Neil nodded and looked down at his hands. He could do that. The thing was, though, that he felt the opposite of sick. He hadn’t gone out of his way to chase this feeling after the first time but, if he was honest, he really did not mind it all that much. 

Even when he slept, he always had a million things on his mind for as long as he could remember. ‘Dye your roots’ this and ‘your accent is giving away’ that. Now, staring at the hypnotically fast-paced game that he’d just been a part of, he had absolutely nothing on his mind. And, though that had freaked him out the first time it happened, he was slowly learning how to let his guard down. With Andrew at his side. 

With that being said, he also knew through the numbness that now really was not the time or place for this. 

He stood from the bench slowly (with Andrew’s permission) and pressed a hand to the protective glass, not flinching when the ball made it rumble beneath his touch. He could still feel the energy behind the game, even in this state. 

Not two minutes after he stood up, the glow of red around the inner court as time in the first half ran out flowed onto his hand and his team was marching into the team zone. He marveled at the score- 6-1- and was surprised when he heard the door seal shut again to find that his teammates’ eyes were all on him as they crowded the space. 

“Is he okay?” Dan aimed at Wymack. Neil found it telling that she didn’t ask him directly.

“He, um,” Wymack started, weighing how much he wanted to tell the team. He sighed and scratched his head. “We’re keeping an eye on him.”

Neil stared back at the lot who were keeping their distance. He gave a small wave to show he could hear them. 

“He’s not… concussed?” Dan asked, that worried look still on her face. “He seems… well...”

Kevin, watching from behind her with a hard stare, looked to Wymack for answers as well. 

“Let’s, um… talk in the meeting room,” he responded, giving the crowd a wary glance before heading toward the locker room.

Neil felt a hand on his back that pushed him after his coach and his teammates’ worried looks still on him the entire way to the team meeting room. They didn’t let up, even as he was sat on the metal brown chair next to Andrew. His heavy eyelids made him _really_ tempted to lean on Andrew’s shoulder but he didn’t want to act even more out of character- even if he knew he could definitely get away with it right now. 

“Ok, there’s no point in me talking defense with you all staring at Josten,” came Wymack’s voice from the front. “But I need to know you’ll all be able to handle it like the mature adults you aren’t. And that means nothing leaves this room. If you don’t trust yourself to go gossiping to the press or your non-existent friends, there’s the door.”

The coach waited but nobody moved. Most of the freshman nodded, a serious expression on their faces- save for Jack, who had a small, amused smirk on his face. The upperclassmen, who had been sat down for too many Neil-related talks like this, braced themselves.

Wymack sighed again. “Josten…,” he started, still not decided on his word choice, “ate something that was laced... with marijuana.” Neil felt the team’s eyes shift to him. Neil turned to meet them, finding a range of curiosity to disbelief to anger- and that was just on Kevin alone. 

“So, he’s not concussed? Just… stoned?” Matt asked slowly.

“Yup,” Wymack confirmed after yet another deep sigh. 

There was a pause and then the team erupted into laughter. Neil felt his face heat up and smiled in kind, glad his team wasn't angry with him.

“How did that even happen?” asked Allison, leaning forward in her seat to get a closer look.

“Environmental club bake sale,” Andrew answered for Neil.

The foxes roared in another wave of laughter- Neil even caught Aaron’s small grin. Wow. It was so _nice_ that everyone was so happy. _Yay_. 

“Unbelievable,” grumbled Kevin a few chairs away from Neil. Okay, so maybe not _everyone_. 

Neil leaned forward to meet Kevin’s disappointed glare. “Who doesn’t know that the environmental club puts weed in their shit?” he asked accusingly. “Didn’t it seem weird that one granola bar was $15?”

Neil didn’t appreciate his tone and so was a little smug when he was able to say, “It wasn’t. They gave it to me _for free_ ... because I was _nice_.” He caught Kevin’s eyebrows raise before leaning back with folded arms. 

He realized Andrew was now giving him a testy look in his periphery and that his teammates were still gasping for breaths around the room- still laughing at something. 

“What?” he asked. Nobody answered what. He just got more knowing looks. 

_‘What's so funny?’_ he thought. _He could be nice >:(._

“Ok, glad we got that out of our systems,” Wymack said, not able to hide his own tired smile. “And the official story is a sprained ankle, got it?” The team nodded with teary eyes. 

“Josten, go change- I don’t think I have to explain that you’re done for the night.” Neil felt the urge to argue for a moment before realizing he had no case. He rose to his feet and left his laughing teammates behind, only noticing Andrew behind him after he’d gathered his clothes from his locker. 

“Hey,” he said, excited about the alone-ness. He bit his lip to stifle a giggle.

Andrew remained unamused and sweaty. “Just here to make sure you don’t drown, fool.” 

Neil looked unconvinced. “Don’t make me late for the second half,” Andrew said with finality. Neil sighed and pulled off what he could before stomping off to the showers. 

He stripped and turned on the shower, reaching for the stall door out of instinct before realizing the walls were red, not orange. He ignored the self-consciousness that nagged at him and stepped under the stream. 

_Oh._

The cool water on his hot and sweaty skin was so amazingly familiar and he immediately sighed into the feeling. His sore muscles felt especially exhausted tonight and the droplets running over his back and into his mouth were really hitting the spot. He let his arms fall to his sides and closed his eyes. 

He was startled out of his trance by the knock to the stall wall after who knows how many minutes. “Almost done?” came Andrew’s voice. 

Neil pushed the knob to the water off with two hands and wiped some water from his face. “Yes,” he said quickly, realizing he hadn’t done much but get wet. _Oh, well._

He turned in a circle looking for his towel before Andrew flung one over the side for him. With it, he dried off as quick as he could- which was not very fast, considering the circumstances- and pulled his clothes on. More specifically, since putting on pants in the shower without getting them wet was already challenging, by the time Neil got his jeans on, they were soaked to the middle of the calves on each side. _’Oh, great,’ _he thought.__

__It made Andrew give him some kind of look when he shuffled out, wet towel and sweaty clothes in hand. He swore the blonde turned away as fast as he did in order to hide a small smile he just barely saw forming and decided that the wet jeans were worth it._ _

__The team was streaming out of the team room as they reached the other side of the locker room and Neil and Andrew slipped right behind them, Wymack filling in Andrew on anything relevant he missed. Neil listened out of habit and took a long second to realize he was being called elsewhere. He glanced over at Nicky and caught the tail end of his sentence._ _

__“....in my locker if you need them.”_ _

__Neil stared at Nicky’s honest and sweet smile for a long moment before asking, “What?”_ _

__“Oh,” Nicky started again, looking at Neil sympathetically, “if you need other pants?” He glanced downward to indicate what he was talking about. “I have some in my locker you can use.”_ _

__Neil meant to respond but was suddenly distracted by the white noise as the team trailed onto the court for the second half. He tried to act as normal as possible, even feigning a bit of a limp to add credibility to his injured ankle alibi. He stopped, though, when he noticed Kevin giving him a testy look._ _

__He stood on the outskirts of the team huddle and watched sadly as his teammates left for the inner court. He slumped down on the edge of their bench with a sigh, thankful that Andrew was off with him- at least for now- and drank the water bottle he was handed obediently under Andrew’s relentless watch._ _

__The other six benched teammates were an uncommon mix- a result of Wymack using the large point lead to testrun the first-years and different combinations on the court. Dan and Matt were giving pointers to one of the freshman strikers while Aaron ignored the younger player that shared his position. The freshman goalie watched Renee defend her net with a Neil-like intensity. Well, a _sober_ Neil. There was nothing intense about the pouty, bloodshot sophomore that could currently barely manage to sit up straight on the bench. _ _

__Neil groaned where he sat and slouched over his lap, feeling useless. He wasn’t even allowed to be in his uniform anymore. During a _game_. It was sacrilege._ _

__“Are you alright?” Andrew asked, bringing a hang to Neil’s neck. Neil sighed a mix of happiness at the touch and frustration at his thoughts._ _

__“I wanna play,” he muttered into his arms, reminding himself of a toddler. Andrew’s grip loosened but still rested on Neil’s tan skin._ _

__“You’ll be playing for the rest of your life, junkie. Enjoy the night off,” Andrew responded. Neil just groaned again into his arms._ _

__His mind started to spin behind his closed eyes and it would’ve been more scary if he hadn’t experienced this feeling before. Thoughts of calculus, white exy jerseys and club tables half-formed in his mind before breaking off into nothing. _Red walls_ and _Nicky’s pants_ and _Andrew’s cookies_ (which he was really in the mood for right now, by the way) disjointedly surged through him. Andrew’s grip kept it from all falling apart. _ _

__“How’s the kid?” Wymack asked, cutting through his cesspool of a thought process._ _

__“Same,” Andrew responded, leaving his hand on Neil’s neck as the redhead sat up to address his coach._ _

__“Mm good,” Neil said, blinking through the haze in front of him in order to focus on his coach._ _

__“I’m sure,” their coach said quietly. And then, “Minyard- we’re starting to get a little sloppy out there and I need you to make sure USC doesn’t have any miracle comebacks tonight. Can you make it?”_ _

__Neil watched Andrew look his way, forming an answer based on how pitiful he looked._ _

__“You can go- Abby’s here,” Neil reassured him, his tone a kind of soft they usually saved for when they were alone._ _

__Andrew thought this over and then, after a squeeze to Neil’s neck (which he knew was ticklish, god dammit), stood and waited at the door to be subbed in. Neil followed after him with his eyes, already missing the contact._ _

__When the whistle finally blew and Renee began jogging from her goal, Andrew turned around before putting his helmet on and locked eyes with Neil. Neil rested his face in his hands and cocked his head to the side in question. Andrew shook his head and muttered something Neil couldn’t decipher in response, heading on to the court._ _

__Neil found himself rising to his feet as Andrew took his place, leaning against the glass as the suspended play began. Immediately, the ball was passed back to Andrew, who hit it upcourt for Kevin to sink into the goal. Neil glanced at the scoreboard as the court lit up red- 8-3- and the familiar sight made him _ache_ to be out there right now. He briefly considered trying to convince Wymack he was sober before realizing that he was already changed out of uniform, anyways. That was the only thing, though. _ _

__He sighed and leaned more heavily on the glass. At least it wasn’t too hard in this state of mind to daydream himself into the middle of the action and pretend that _he_ was the one making the crowd cheer and gasp. He could feel the familiar electricity running through him in the same way it normally did during games and he was able to get completely lost in it. He pressed his face even closer, the glass fogging up beneath his nose, and smirked as he quickly wrote “GO #10” before it disappeared again. It somehow made him feel better. _ _

__The stadium’s energy was falling as time ran out as the USC crowd lost more faith in their team. Neil noticed a large number of people get up and head for the exits as Andrew easily blocked another goal and knocked the ball all the way up court yet again. Apparently, USC’s dealer did as well- before the play even ended, he threw his racquet on the court floor and stormed towards the rest of his team off-court. The opposing goalie did manage to block Jack’s shot as the final buzzer sounded, but it didn’t do much to change the landslide victory._ _

__As the game ended, Neil couldn’t decide if he wanted to flare up with jealousy over the team’s on-court celebration or let his heart throb over the familiar sight of Andrew staring at them blankly from his goal. His decision was made for him when Andrew’s eyes flicked over in his direction, holding him in place. He smiled lazily, tilting his head to the side. The way Andrew tilted his head in kind and briefly poked his tongue out before turning away again- so quickly that nobody else could see- pushed him over the edge. He tried (unsuccessfully) to quiet his airy giggles with his hand._ _

__“Everything good?” Neil turned to see Matt and Dan’s amused expressions. He blinked at the tired feeling in his eyes and settled around a grin, replaying the sight of Andrew’s small, pink tongue teasing him in his mind._ _

__“Yeah,” he responded, barely pushing down the laugh that sat in his throat when he opened his mouth. He noticed Abby watching him as well, though her expression looked mostly concerned._ _

__“Your, uh, ankle hasn’t gotten any worse?” Matt continued, Abby stepping forward to take Neil’s wrist in her hand to check his heart rate._ _

__“No- I’m just sad I couldn’t play.”_ _

__“You wouldn’t have played much this half anyways- the newbies needed some experience,” Wymack reassured him. Neil scrunched up his face, unconvinced, which for some reason made Matt laugh and pat his shoulder._ _

__The sound of the court door opening was followed by the familiar feeling of a grip on his arm. He didn’t even have to look down to know who it was, but he did anyway because he wanted to see his face. “Hi, goalie.”_ _

__“Hey, space cadet,” Andrew responded, walking him forward as the team began moving to the locker rooms. He took a short sip of water before passing the bottle to Neil. “Anything new?”_ _

__Neil hummed, barely registering the question- he was mainly lost in the sight of the passing walls, amazed at how expertly Andrew was navigating the unfamiliar stadium. “Um,” he started, searching for an answer he wasn’t sure could be found, “...no. Just… relaxed. You know.” Andrew hummed but didn’t say anything else as they walked._ _

__His ears adjusted to the quieter locker room and team meeting room as they came through and, as if no time had passed since half time, Neil was sat in the same brown metal chair once more, staring a slightly sweaty Andrew in the face. He blinked at him, resisting the urge to point out that they were alone again._ _

__“Stay here. I’ll be back soon.” Neil nodded, glancing at one of the hands Andrew had gripped on him and smiling._ _

__“Do you need anything?” Andrew asked, his tone softer than usual but still flat otherwise. Neil knew exactly what he wanted but took a few moments to find the right words._ _

__He reached up to hold the arms holding him and looked Andrew in the eye. Slowly enough that the other could stop him, he leaned forward and planted a quick kiss to the other man’s cheek. “No,” he said. “Just you.”_ _

__Andrew watched him with a lack of emotion that would have been jarring to anyone that wasn’t Neil. “You’re getting predictable.” His unimpressed tone stood in opposition to his tightening grip. Neil giggled a bit at the feeling._ _

__“And you’re getting soft,” Neil hummed out. He could hear the implied ‘shut up’ in Andrew’s responding bite to his neck, which made Neil gasp into his kiss._ _

__The gentle scratch of Andrew’s fingers in his hair felt brand new with his head up in the clouds and kissing back seemed like the only thing in the world that mattered. Suddenly, Andrew was wearing way too much gear and being benched from tonight’s second half was the farthest thing from Neil’s mind- both their minds, for that matter. Neil used his gentle grip to pull Andrew forward towards his lap and, surprising them both, the shorter man actually let himself be pulled._ _

__All too soon Andrew pulled back and Neil realized why as he registered the sound of more of his teammates bustling into the meeting room. Andrew released his grip slowly and walked into the locker room, passing Jack and Samsa as they entered. Neil heard Jack’s scoff and saw the look of judgement cross his face but was far too blissed out to care about a homophobic freshman at this moment._ _

__He stared up at the ceiling with a smile and only moved it to watch the door when it opened again, willing Andrew back at his side. Unfortunately, none of the upperclassmen that entered were quite the man he was looking for, making him sink into his chair and sigh dramatically._ _

__“Why so bummed, Neil- we won _and_ you’re blasted right now,” Matt asked, taking a seat across from him. “There’s multiple reasons to celebrate.”_ _

__Neil peeked an eye open and saw that he now had an audience. He shrugged and leaned his head all the way to one side. “Nothing,” he said, smiling at the inside joke._ _

__“Oh, look at that,” Nicky said, sitting next to him and nodding at the red mark on Neil’s neck. “They already found time to get it on. I swear, they are insufferable when weed is involved.”_ _

__“No,” Neil said defensively, though he could picture the glowing red hickey on his skin._ _

__“Ok, you’ve convinced me,” Nicky said sarcastically._ _

__“It’s probably gonna be even worse tonight since Andrew’s jealous. _Please_ don’t leave me alone with them again,” he aimed at Aaron, who was trying to ignore the conversation completely. Neil furrowed his brows at the comment- _jealous_?_ _

__“I still can’t believe you didn't know about the environmental club,” Dan said before he could ask. “How big was the thing?”_ _

__Neil raised his hands to indicate the size of the granola bar- about as big as a smartphone. Dan whistled and Matt laughed. “Oh, you must be flying, huh?” Neil giggled and shrugged in response._ _

__“And this guy just gave it to you? Because you were, uh, nice?” Allison asked. Neil didn’t answer right away, distracted by the re-entrance of Andrew into the meeting room. He smiled and felt even more giddy when he got nothing in response, though he thought he might get slapped if he kept staring at the wet blonde strands that covered his forehead, so he forced himself to peel his eyes away and answer Allison’s question._ _

__“I gave him a dollar,” Neil shrugged. “I think he felt bad because I… bumped into their table,” Neil said, censoring the part about how he’d completely overturned that thing. “And I think he liked exy- he said he was gonna watch the game tonight.”_ _

__Allison shifted her eyes to Matt and Dan, who seemed to never stop smiling tonight. Andrew’s mood contrasted theirs as his shoulders seemed weirdly tense- Neil suddenly wanted to be in private so he could ask what was wrong._ _

__“Where are Kevin and coach?” he asked, scanning the room when he started to wonder why they hadn’t left yet._ _

__“They’re handling the press- father son duo,” Nicky responded. “They had a lot of questions about why our star vice-captain played so little tonight.”_ _

__“It’s lucky that they don’t know Neil well enough to know that he’d totally keep playing on a sprained ankle and call bullshit on the story,” Allison added. Neil couldn’t disagree._ _

__“At least baby Jack got some playing time, right?” Matt aimed at the first-year._ _

__“I played because I’m part of the team,” Jack returned humorlessly. “And don’t call me that.”_ _

__Matt raised his eyebrows but didn’t actually look phased by the first-year. “Either way,” Dan said, picking up where he left off, “I’m glad you guys got to play tonight. Samsa killed it in the goal.”_ _

__Neil tuned out as they began discussing the game, mostly out of bitterness that he couldn’t share any of the glory. Instead, he rolled his head back so he could stare at Andrew some more who, if he hadn’t just kissed him ten minutes ago, he’d be sure wanted nothing to do with him based on the colder-than-usual shoulder he was receiving._ _

__Soon enough, though, Kevin and coach returned to the meeting room and, after a quick congratulations, had everyone on their feet to head back to the bus. Andrew ushered Neil out last first holding his arm and made Neil smile wider when he slipped his grip down to the taller man’s hand._ _

__The cool air of the South Carolina night felt refreshing compared to the musty stadium air- though Neil was far from being tired of the smell of athletic gear and sweaty teammates. Half the team had boarded the bus before the back of the line was swarmed by a few stray reporters. Neil was caught off guard by the flashing lights of cameras and the voices that he realized were talking at him. He was yanked away from Andrew’s grip in the fuss before he could help it and was suddenly standing in front of a very bright light and camera._ _

__“Mr. Josten, do you care to comment on the injury you sustained tonight? Will this affect the rest of your season?”_ _

__Neil squinted in the light, trying to formulate a general answer- nobody had filled him in on the details of his ankle sprain. “Um, I don’t-” was all he got out before he was once more being whisked away by a now-irritated Andrew and led back onto the bus. He leaned over in their usual seat to see Wymack and Kevin scolding the reporters before heading onto the bus themselves. Kevin settled into the seat behind his with a huff._ _

__“Why did you do that?” Neil asked Andrew and Kevin. “I told you- I’ve been trying to be _nice_. I was just gonna answer her question without, like… cursing.”_ _

__“That’s not exactly what we were worried about,” Kevin said tiredly. Neil only took a moment to catch up- maybe it it _was_ better that he didn’t appear on sports news high out of his mind. _ _

__“Oh,” he said out loud._ _

__“Don’t worry Neil- I think you more than proved your capacity to be _nice_ today. Just… save some for me next time you charm your way into getting special granola bars for free,” Nicky added from a few seats in front of him before sitting down. Andrew barked out something low in German that Neil wasn’t able to pick out- but it didn’t sound happy. Nicky didn’t say anything else._ _

__The engine started and the bus began to roll out of the parking lot as Neil thought over Nicky’s words, coming up short for meaning._ _

__“What does he mean?” he asked Andrew finally._ _

__Andrew slid his gaze away from straight ahead to Neil. “He was flirting with you, numbskull.”_ _

__Neil blinked in surprise. He looked between the seat in front and the man next to him. “Nicky?” he asked._ _

__Nicky failed to disguise his loud laugh as a cough and this time Neil caught Andrew’s sharp _halt die Klappe_ in his direction._ _

__“No, Neil,” Andrew said, not meeting Neil’s eyes this time. “The environmentalist that got our most accident-prone striker so high that he had to be taken out of the very game said environmentalist was so eager to watch. Ring a bell?”_ _

__An image of a long-haired, scruffy man flashed in Neil’s mind as he took Andrew’s words in. Oh. So _that’s_ what everyone was smiling about._ _

__“You’re always so colorful with your sentences,” he smiled. Andrew grunted and glanced out the window._ _

__“Andrew,” Neil started, now as amused as his teammates had been, “I’m pretty sure… he was just being nice. I… _ran_ into the table. And then I helped pick it up and donated. Nothing else.”_ _

__“I refuse to believe anyone in that club is heterosexual on principal, Neil.”_ _

__Neil stuttered out a response. “Maybe he was the exception?”_ _

__Andrew finally turned to face him. “No offense, red, but you wouldn’t know that someone was into you if they dropped down on one knee and asked for your hand in marriage. Even through your dense version of events we all know granola guy is into you.”_ _

__Neil looked his face over and sighed. He wasn’t fully convinced but he could see where Andrew and his other teammates were coming from. The only importance it had to him, though, was how it seemed to be affecting Andrew._ _

__He tried to lighten things up. With a smirk, he asked “Are you jealous?”_ _

__Andrew’s eyes shrunk in a squint. “Not really thrilled about the whole laced thing, is all.”_ _

__Neil sighed, leaning the side of his head against the seat while he gazed into the other man’s glare. “Andrew,” he said in the Russian that they’d been working on over the summer together. “You know I’m not gay, right?”_ _

__“I’m familiar with the speil, yes,” Andrew answered in kind._ _

__Neil arched his eyebrows, dropping his smile. “I don’t think it’s enough, though.” Andrew’s face remained unimpressed._ _

__“I think I need to entirely rebrand myself. I don’t think the message is coming through. Yeah…,” he started, thinking it over._ _

__“If anyone asks, tell them I’m Andrew-sexual.”_ _

__He didn’t smile, but Neil saw the familiar softening of Andrew’s eyes that came whenever he made a stupid joke like that._ _

__“ _Debil_ ,” is what Andrew said in response. _ _

__“I mean it,” Neil said, pushing his shoulder into Andrew’s._ _

__“That’s the sad part,” Andrew answered, lifting his arm up around Neil’s shoulders. Neil smiled and leaned into the warmth._ _

__He let his mind drift in the dark of the bus and found it easy to settle comfortably without squirming around too much. And just like on the night of the party, all too soon the bus was slowing down to park. Andrew didn’t shift to get up, which would have been easy to take advantage of, but Neil raised his head up and tried to focus out the window instead._ _

__“Are we already back at the court?” he asked, squinting through the dark of the bus._ _

__“No- rest stop,” Andrew answered. “The freshmen were bothering Abby for coffee.”_ _

__Neil turned and, as reported, saw the first-years and most of his other teammates filing off the bus. He realized Andrew was trying to join them, standing in his window seat and waiting for Neil to let him pass. Neil’s surprise showed on his face._ _

__“I’m tired of listening to your loud stomach. Let’s go get some food.” Andrew said to him._ _

__Neil somehow hadn’t even noticed the echoing pit in his stomach but realized as Andrew said the words that he was completely right. He supposed it was probably a good idea to just let Andrew take the wheel for him tonight entirely, as a matter of fact._ _

__He pried himself from his seat and let Andrew out first- the aisle was harder for him to navigate right now than he would care to admit and he needed a shoulder to hold onto. Luckily, they made it down the bus steps and across the parking lot without incident._ _

__Stepping into the small rest stop, Neil had to take a moment to reorient himself. He blinked and watched Andrew lead a few steps in front of him before turning around. He realized he’d probably fallen even farther under the effect of the drugs on the bus ride from the way he could somehow _feel_ the soft retail music sinking into the top of his skull. _ _

__“Excuse me,” came a voice from beside Neil that made him realize he was blocking the doors._ _

__“Oh- sorry,” he said, letting the short (but still taller than him) woman by and catching up to Andrew._ _

__“Still okay?” the blonde asked, taking a moment to look Neil over in the light._ _

__Neil shrugged. “Just more intense but… the same, yeah.”_ _

__Andrew looked him over again before turning his head towards the small outlets. “Let’s get some food in you.”_ _

__They walked past the counters with their roll-down covers drawn but confused Neil even more when they kept walking towards the one that was still open- Chik-fil-A._ _

__“Hey, why not here?” he asked, not slowing his pace behind Andrew. “They’re pretty good.” Andrew glanced at the small fast food outlet and then at Neil briefly before continuing ahead as though Neil hadn’t said anything._ _

__He didn’t provide an answer until they were standing in front of the refrigerated food and Andrew was examining different plastic containers full of cut up fruit._ _

__“They’re homophobic,” he said so out of the blue that Neil had to think for a good minute before he was able to remember his question._ _

__“The… chicken place?” Neil asked, squinting as he tried to detect any joking tone in Andrew’s words. Andrew just nodded, shoving two containers into Neil’s arms, and moved towards the shelved food._ _

__Neil wasn’t sure if it was because he was high or because of Andrew’s usual failure to elaborate but he was completely lost. “How?” was the followup question they went with._ _

__“Donations to other anti-gay groups. Like Salvation Army.”_ _

__Neil stared at Andrew, who finally spared him a curious glance. “Salvation army is anti-gay too?”_ _

__Andrew’s eyes had the color of a smile as he spoke. “I hate to be the one to break this, Neil, but the world isn’t exactly too fond of people like us.”_ _

__He gazed at Neil as he considered this, waiting for a response. “Well,” he started, cocking his head and transfixed on two strangely vibrant hazel orbs, “I wasn’t exactly that many people’s favorite in the first place. Right?”_ _

__Andrew blinked and turned back towards the shelves, failing to hide his now wide smile. “Right,” is all he said, loading up his arms with snacks as he shook his head. (Neil would have offered to help hold them but was like 99% sure he’d be turned down.)_ _

__Before long, Andrew was leading them closer to the front with a respectable variety of junk food in hand. He stopped them before the register to serve himself coffee- Neil’s attention wandered as Andrew got busy ripping up dozens of small sugar packets for his cup._ _

__He moved a couple steps to a case of shelves with dozens of different random knick-knacks trying to make South Carolina look exciting. He poked at the Gamecock bobble head but restrained himself from touching the snowglobes, not trusting his current motor abilities to keep them safe._ _

__He stood on tiptoes to see what was on the top shelf and almost dismissed the row of stuffed animals but stopped when he noticed the shiny, metallic glimmer they all shared. He reached out to touch one and felt his mouth drop open as the rows of sequins flipped under his fingers- both from the sight and the feeling the action created. _Holy shit._ _ _

__He was in the middle of trying to write his team number into the side of a multi-colored pig when Andrew called his name from behind him. He paused and turned to see the shorter man waiting on him. He looked Neil up and down. “Do you want anything else?” he asked, taking a sip from his coffee._ _

__Neil didn’t say anything but turned his head a bit towards the shelf. Andrew sighed. “I meant any other food.”_ _

__Neil couldn’t curb his excitement and grabbed one of the animals from the top shelf. “Have you ever seen one of these before?” he asked, whispering so he didn’t accidentally start yelling._ _

__Andrew glanced down at Neil running his finger back and forth across the grey and blue shark. “I can’t say I have,” he responded, freeing a finger from around his coffee cup to touch the toy himself._ _

__Neil couldn’t quite tell how convinced he was so he decided to just go for it. “I have to buy one.”_ _

__Andrew looked at him, his eyes again smiling in that way that didn’t quite reach his mouth. He shrugged. “Then get one,” he said simply._ _

__Neil smiled fiercely and turned back around on his tiptoes, eyes darting across the different animals. He realized with a sinking feeling a glaring dilemma._ _

__He turned back around and thought for a moment. “Just… one?”_ _

__Andrew rolled his eyes. “Yes, one. We can’t buy more than that.”_ _

__Neil patted his pockets and smiled when he felt his wallet. “I can pay, too!”_ _

__Andrew took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a moment. “There’s not enough room on your bed for that many. Right?”_ _

__Neil felt this information hit him. Andrew was right. It was already snug when the two of them slept together- no way they’d fit the whole shelf in with them. Damn._ _

__“How about two?” he asked hopefully._ _

__Andrew sighed again. “Yeah, that’s fine.”_ _

__Neil turned back to the shelf and stared for a moment but still couldn’t decide. He sighed and turned back around, shaking his head. “Never mind,” he told Andrew. It was hopeless._ _

__He felt a hand stop him and then the bags of snacks getting shoved into his arms. He held them and watched Andrew step up to the shelf, stepping on the lowermost one in order to see the animals. He only took a moment to choose one from the shelf and hold it out for Neil to see- a white and gold rabbit._ _

__Neil smiled. “I like it.”_ _

__They carried everything up to the counter, Andrew swatting away Neil’s hand that offered up his wallet, and headed back to the bus. Neil found it challenging balancing his attention between the small stuffed animal and following Andrew through the dark but, somehow, he managed._ _

__They were the last back on the bus, but not too far behind their other teammates. They got a number of amused smiles and ‘still good?’s aimed at Neil as they found their seats, during each of which Neil had to resist the urge to show off his newest possession- even like this, he knew he’d never live that down._ _

__When they sat down, Andrew handed Neil one of the fruit containers and Neil relegated his rabbit to the crook of his arm so he could start working away at its contents. Predictably, the fruit was almost all either over or under ripe, but Neil really did not mind. He was high and starving._ _

__After making sure everyone was back on board with a roll call (which Neil initially missed), Abby set back onto the highway. The bus was filled with a bit more chatter now and Neil was distracted with (unsuccessfully) trying to listen into Kevin and Aaron’s conversation when his eye caught the small movie screen flickering on again. It took a moment to load but, once it did, the middle of another animated movie flickered on._ _

__Neil was immediately hooked. He couldn’t quite hear what was happening but the bright colors looked so _nice_ , especially surrounded by the dark of the bus. He watched in awe as he chewed, impressed mostly by how lost he was- the plot just became more of a giant question mark as it progressed (and in spite of the fact that he was pretty sure he’d seen this film before). _ _

__“What is this called?” he asked Andrew, pointing with a slice of kiwi towards the screen._ _

__Andrew’s eyes stayed on the movie, which he was also watching. “Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs.”_ _

__Ok, so that did sound familiar. Knowing this did not help clear things up, however. “What’s happening?” he asked._ _

__Andrew answered again without looking away. “The guy with the big nose invented a machine that makes food fall from the sky. Right now, he’s trying to shut it down because he knows something’s wrong, but the mayor is still making money off it so he won’t let him.”_ _

__Neil stared at the screen again, suddenly not feeling so bad about not being able to figure things out for himself. “Well I bet that won’t last long,” he said to show Andrew that he was catching on._ _

__Andrew gave him a quick knowing smirk before turning back to watch. “Haven’t you seen this before?” he asked._ _

__Neil knew the question was rhetorical since Andrew couldn’t _not_ remember when they’d watched the movie together the first time. _ _

__“ _Yes_ ,” Neil answered, rolling his eyes, “but this plot is so… out there. How’d they even think of this?” he asked, watching giant slices of pizza flop over the animated city. _ _

__“I think it’s supposed to comment on America’s obesity epidemic and the general disregard we have for the environment because of capitalism at the same time. That part especially.”_ _

__Neil blinked at his words. “Oh,” he said. “I don’t really know what that means... but I definitely wouldn’t have figured that out.”_ _

__“I’ll write you an analysis,” Andrew replied._ _

__Neil giggled. “Okay.”_ _

__They spent the rest of the ride watching the movie together, Neil being shocked over and over again by whatever happened next. He just couldn’t seem to wrap his mind around _why_ for anything and Andrew’s explanations more made him giggle around his bites of fruit than actually help him understand. _ _

__In no time at all, they were back on campus. The effects of the granola bar were apparently still going strong, so Neil mainly just served as moral support as the team loaded the equipment off the bus and back into the foxhole court. After another check in with Abby, the team said goodbye to their coach and headed back to their cars._ _

__“See you all back in the basement, yeah?” Dan called out to the team._ _

__Nobody called out with any disagreement- they’d all planned to spend time together after the game tonight and on the bus ride home, it’d been decided that nobody was really up to going out. It was hard to coordinate nights like that- the team had only been out all together two more times since last Halloween. The semi-private of the Fox Tower basement was usually where they went for family bonding nights._ _

__So, instead of going straight back home, both Andrew’s lot and everyone in Matt’s truck made a detour to a liquor store a couple miles off campus. Neil enjoyed the privileges of the front seat and, despite the calculating he got when he asked, was positive that Andrew got him the Smirnoff Ice he requested._ _

__Back at the apartments, after dropping off their things in their rooms (which, to Neil’s displeasure and at Andrew’s insistence, included the toy rabbit), the first-years were waiting in the basement. The alcohol didn’t take long to get distributed amongst the room and a few of the foxes split up into teams to play vodka pong- the foxes’ more efficient (and dangerous) version of beer pong- while the rest of the team crowded to watch._ _

__The trio of Kevin, Aaron and a freshman striker named Jared taking on the veterans of Matt, Dan and Allison was a very entertaining match to watch. Kevin had poetically terrible aim and was even worse at hiding his frustration, which the rest of the team diffused with their laughter._ _

__Neil took full advantage of the set up and heckled Kevin before and after every shot he missed. After what was probably Neil’s 10th rip about a backliner having better aim than him when Allison scored once more against Kevin, instead of downing the shot in the cup, Kevin tried to splash the contents on a giggling Neil. When the vodka landed over Nicky instead, Neil just started laughing harder._ _

__The game ended in a landslide victory comparable to the team’s earlier win against Columbia and the players shifted around for a few rounds until the team got tired of the game. At that point, Allison gathered all 14 foxes in a circle around a small table for another game. Several of them, including Neil and Andrew, tried to object and go to bed but she insisted it was way too early. And so, a grudging agreement of ‘just a few rounds’ was made and the foxes settled down in a large circle._ _

__Allison shushed the room as she sat down and placed a single beer can on the table, spreading out a deck of cards along its circumference._ _

__“What is this game?” Jack asked from the floor._ _

__“Let me _explain_ \- and listen close, junior, because this is a fox favorite.”_ _

__Neil giggled and took a sip of his lemonade-flavored vodka. He still wasn’t up to the level of Nicky or Kevin when it came to drinking but he let himself loosen up a little bit more now. And he couldn’t quite ignore the echo of Nicky’s voice in his head saying ‘ _when in Rome_.’_ _

__“This game is called ‘king’s cup’,” Allison started. “The idea is that you pick a random card from the table and, depending on what you draw, have to do something in turn. Like, five/guys- draw a five and all the guys drink which, unfortunately, is the majority of this team.”_ _

__“True,” Nicky agreed._ _

__Allison gestured at him in appreciation and continued. “Or, Queen/question, when you get to ask anyone in the circle a question- if they answer, you drink and if they don’t, they drink. We’ll explain as we go. Everyone got their drinks?”_ _

__There was an affirmative noise around the circle. Allison smiled. “Alright, then. I’ll go first.”_ _

__Allison drew a card and rolled her eyes as she read it. “Lame,” she said, showing the 3 of clubs to the group. “3 means the drawers drinks-” she paused as she did this “-and after every card, you put it under the tab, like this.” She slid her card under the beer can's tab. “Whoever breaks the can open has to drink it all.”_ _

__She turned to her left. “Okay Matt- you’re up.”_ _

__Matt pulled a card and then immediately began scanning the group. “Kevin,” he said, holding out his queen of spades. Kevin raised his brows in acknowledgment across the room._ _

__“Have you ever google searched your own name?”_ _

__The grinning foxes turned to Kevin, who furrowed his brow and shrugged. “Yeah, obviously,” he said. Laughter broke out around the circle, Matt smiling into his drink. Kevin did not look humored._ _

__“Have you not?” he asked, disbelieving._ _

__“It’s just funny when you do it,” Allison said, gasping for breath. There was another surge of laughter in agreement._ _

__Kevin muttered something to himself in disgruntled French and sunk back into his chair. Dan pulled her card, still laughing._ _

__“Op- 5- guys drink,” she said, sliding her card under the tab. Neil tapped his bottle with Andrew’s red solo cup as they took a sip._ _

__“10- what does that mean?” Jack asked, holding out his card before pushing it under the tab._ _

__“Categories,” came Kevin’s voice. “You say a general thing- like plant- and we all have to name different types. Whoever can’t think of one fast enough first has to drink.”_ _

__“Hm,” Jack said in thought. “X-men,” he said decidedly._ _

__There was a brief pause before the first year next to him- Lily- spoke up. “Wolverine.”_ _

__The next first-year spoke up fast. “Magneto”._ _

__All too soon for Neil, Andrew’s voice sounded next to him. “Shatterstar.”_ _

__Neil’s eyes darted at his teammates as the silence fell with him. “Um,” is what he said._ _

__His team laughed at him. “Drink up, Josten. And catch up on your Marvel comics.” came Matt’s voice._ _

__Neil just continued to stare, obediently taking a sip of his drink. “I don’t even know what that _is_ ,” he said quietly. _ _

__The next two freshmen went and learned that four means you drop everything to touch the floor and seven causes the opposite to happen. Then, Andrew was up._ _

__“The word ‘drink’,” he said, flashing his king of hearts before shoving it under the beer tab. The circle groaned around him._ _

__“He always does this,” mumbled Kevin. The freshmen looked around, confused._ _

__“Drawing a king means you ban a word. If you say the banned word, you have to… sip,” Allsion explained. Neil caught Andrew’s smirk in his periphery._ _

__“My turn,” Neil hummed, reaching forward with the little coordination he had left. He picked a card, only knocking the beer can over twice in the process, and squinted to read the ‘8’ in the top corner._ _

__“8/mate,” he said, grinning with his teeth. “Hmmm,” he said, bringing his hand to his chin. “Who should I pick, Andrew?”_ _

__This earned a few giggles from around the room, none of which came from the man being questioned. “Someone with luck already as shitty as yours would make sense,” was his dull response._ _

__Neil curled into his chin and giggled, hugging his bottle tight. “Thank you for your application,” he responded, holding his bottle out so they could clink them together again before taking a sip._ _

__“Not this again,” Aaron murmured a short distance away like a prayer._ _

__“Me!” Nicky said, pinching his hands together as he scooted towards the pile. He started laughing evilly and rubbing his hands together as he placed the queen of clubs under the tab. He cocked his head and turned to his right._ _

__“Andrew,” he said. Andrew turned to his cousin, sparing one eyebrow to quirk up at his name._ _

__Nicky tapped the card, face up under the metal tab, and continued to smile. “Question,” he explained. Andrew shrugged and gestured with his cup, telling him to ask away._ _

__Nicky leaned closer across Neil, not quite touching the blonde, and whispered out his question. He leaned back with a grin when he was done, waiting for an answer. Andrew looked unimpressed as Neil watched him look between himself and Nicky._ _

__“Did you see the stuffed rabbit?” was all he said._ _

__Nicky burst into laughter and immediately a chorus of fox voices were demanding to know what Nicky asked. He just shook his head into his drink, waving it off with his hand. Eyes turned to Andrew but nobody spoke aloud the question at the more stoic man._ _

__In usual Andrew fashion, it took a moment of thought, but the answer came eventually. “Nicky wanted to know if Neil is the Nicky or the Erik,” he replied._ _

__“Hey!” Nicky protested with a smile as the rest of the foxes laughed. Neil was still confused._ _

__“What?” Neil asked, looking towards Nicky._ _

__Nicky gave him an amused smile. “In bed?” he started. Neil just blinked in response. “You and I,” he said in German, “we’re better at catching than throwing, no?”_ _

___Oh._ _ _

__Neil turned to Andrew in shock with a growing blush, and then to the upperclassmen, who were still gasping over their laughter._ _

__“What does the rabbit have to do with it?” Neil asked defensively, trying to hide his embarrassment._ _

__Nicky just put a hand on his shoulder, still giggling himself. “Everything, Neil. Everything.”_ _

__Neil shook his head. It was a fucking _cool_ toy._ _

__The game lasted another run through of the foxes before the tab snapped open on Kevin’s 7 of hearts. That felt like a natural end to the night and so, after watching their ambidextrous striker down the can, everyone stood up to head back to their rooms._ _

__Neil followed suit of everyone around him but could only stand and stare as his teammates began putting the furniture back in place and cleaning up empty bottles and cans. At this point, when he tried to think about what he should do next, all he got back in response from the answering part of his brain was a low hum. It felt like all he could do was stand, blink, and let the world happen to him._ _

__“Hey Neil- are you okay?” came Nicky’s voice. Neil saw him, very close, but somehow felt completely numb to his presence. He nodded anyways, knowing there was a very good explanation for how he felt._ _

__Nicky smiled and motioned with his head towards the exit. “Let’s get to bed.”_ _

__“Aww, Neil is leaving? Bye, Neil!”_ _

__He figured out only after his arms were trapped down to his sides in a hug that the voice had been Dan’s. He then found himself completely surrounded after Matt’s demand to ‘let me hug him too!’_ _

__He smiled through the haze and waved at the upperclassmen once he was released and had no objections to the hand around his wrist that began to pull him away from the group right after. He checked and found Andrew at his side, which made him able to be okay with the fact that his brain was nothing but mush right now._ _

__He stumbled a few times up the flights of stairs, asking each time why they couldn’t take the elevator, and being informed each time that there wasn’t one in the building. He took the news hard every time it was broken to him._ _

__He recognized their apartment once they made it back, but it somehow looked different to him. He stood at the breakfast bar, as that is as far as the blonde man pulled him, and watched Andrew fix two glasses of water. The quiet of the room was jarring after being in the noisy basement just three seconds ago and he briefly considered singing to make up for the difference._ _

__He stared at the glass of water he was handed for a while before taking a sip, and wiping at the little bit that dribbled down his chin. Andrew stood in front of him with assessing eyes, slowly drinking from his own glass._ _

__“Do you feel sick?” he asked Neil._ _

__Neil definitely could throw up without much of an issue, but he also wasn’t quite at projectile vomiting yet. The real question was whether or not it’d be worth it to clear some of the drugs out of his system by purging before bed._ _

__“Maybe,” is what he settled on as an answer, forgetting any better words for in between yes and no._ _

__Andrew just watched Neil finish his water and then took the glass, waiting a moment for Neil to suddenly lurch forward or squat down and be sick. Neil just continued to stand and stare, turning to look at the living room as Nicky and Kevin turned it on and watched, sunk down in their beanbags._ _

__Andrew finally sighed. “At least he didn’t say ‘I’m fine.’”_ _

__They walked down the hallway together, Andrew guiding Neil all the way to the toilet before shutting the door. Neil felt very detached from his body as he went through the motions of letting out an ungodly amount of pee and washing his hands at the sink. He only realized he didn’t lock the door when it slowly opened again, Andrew nodding out the door after confirming that Neil hadn’t managed to kill himself within 4 minutes of being alone._ _

__“Be right back,” Andrew said after handing Neil a change of clothes back in their room. “Don’t fall asleep on your back.” Neil nodded and, after waiting a moment for any other half-coherent mumbles, Andrew left him alone to change._ _

__Neil was just about devastated when he found that both articles of clothing were his own. He pulled them on anyways and then, with the angriest expression he could muster on his face, set out to find one of Andrew’s hoodies in protest._ _

__He spotted one on Andrew’s top bunk- an all-black and well-worn thing- and furrowed his brows as he gripped the ladder and prepared for liftoff. And, while it took him three tries to get his foot on the bottom rung, he was proud of how far he made it before he slipped and fell onto the floor._ _

__The fall was kind of step by step- cross-faded Neil was at least able to slow it down before he ended up on the ground. He closed his eyes when it happened, trying to get the room to stop spinning, and met the sight of Andrew above him once he opened them again._ _

__“Are you okay?” he asked, more amused than concerned._ _

__“I wanted one of your shirts,” Neil said instead of answering._ _

__Andrew glanced up at his bed to understand what he meant and then back down at Neil. He pulled at the collar of the shirt Neil was wearing._ _

__“This is mine,” Andrew said._ _

__Neil looked down at his torso, pulling on the hem of the t-shirt to check the design. Sure enough, it was his grey and orange Palmetto Athletics shirt he’d gotten as a hand me down from Matt. He gave Andrew a half-confused, half-angry stare._ _

__“No.” he said stubbornly. “Matt said it didn’t fit him anymore so I took it.” Andrew gave him a curious look._ _

__“And then gave it to me because you thought it was too big,” Andrew added. “... and continued to wear it all the time anyways.”_ _

__Neil realized he was technically right and rolled his eyes. “That doesn’t count,” he stated. He raised a heavy arm and poked at Andrew’s chest. “Not the point.”_ _

__Andrew tilted his head as he gazed down and then ran a finger along Neil’s frown line (which happened to let up shortly after)._ _

__“Okay, then, junkie,” he said. Neil watched from the floor as he leaned back and pulled his t-shirt off, holding it out in front of him. “Switch.”_ _

__Neil giggled, pushing himself up so he was sitting, and tugged his own shirt off. He watched it drop in his lap and then smiled at Andrew. When the shorter man reached forward to grab it, Neil spoke up. “Wait,” he said. Andrew waited._ _

__Neil leaned forward, careful through the fog not to quite touch Andrew. “Yes or no?” he asked._ _

__“Yes,” Andrew said. Neil leaned the rest of the way and kissed him, his smile fading as his mind suddenly began broadcasting grainy billboards of Andrew’s face, mouth and absolutely nothing else. He felt a hand brush against his torso, starting at the puckered bullet wound and trailing downwards._ _

__He didn’t notice he was whimpering little sounds until Andrew’s hand squeezing the back of his neck in warning, which arguably just made him less quiet. Andrew leaned back, petting softly at the spot as Neil panted._ _

__“Can’t believe Nicky needed to ask,” Andrew mumbled into Neil’s lips._ _

__“I can’t believe… fucking Jack is probably picturing it now,” Neil replied, cringing at the memory he’d done a good job at deleting until this moment._ _

__Andrew leaned close to his ear. “Let him picture it all he wants. Might as well be accurate,” he whispered. Neil closed his eyes and gasped when he bit down on his neck, feeling the sting through the buzz of the alcohol._ _

__They didn’t put their shirts back on that night._ _

____

~

Neil woke up the next morning with a dull pain at the front of his skull and alone in the bedroom. He squinted at the alarm clock to read the glowing ‘01:39 PM’ and dry-swallowed the 3 aspirins a 5 ft angel must have left there the night before and ripped the covers off before he lost the nerve.

He mostly lost the memories that would explain his lack of everything except boxers but smiled at the flashes that returned slowly. He grabbed the plain white shirt from the floor where Andrew had left it the night before and pulled on the crumpled sweatpants from the foot of the bed. 

He walked on heavy feet to the kitchen, where Andrew was waiting in front of the microwave and Nicky was building a sandwich. 

“Morning sunshine,” Nicky said at Neil’s footsteps. He and Andrew both turned to look at him and froze in place when they took in the sight of him. Nicky began grinning, though he tried to cover his mouth with his hand as he looked between Andrew and Neil. 

“What?” Neil asked, glancing down at his shirt and finding nothing out of the ordinary. 

“Uh,” Nicky said cautiously after a moment, “now might be a good time to invest in some scarves?” 

Rather than waiting for more of an explanation, he walked the short distance to the bathroom, giving a quick look at Andrew as he went. What he saw in the mirror made him forget about his headache completely.

Down both sides of his neck and even along his jaw, an impressive display of hickeys covered his skin. He raised his eyebrows at the sight, feeling at the lovebites with his hands, and finally smiled when he couldn’t help but be impressed.

He made a stop at their room to grab the ratty hoodie he’d been going for last night. He walked back to the kitchen to the sound of a microwave beeping and Nicky passing through to the living room with a bite of sandwich in his mouth. He nodded at Neil’s added layer.

“Cute,” he said with a wink.

Neil walked closer to Andrew as he was pulling the leftovers of vegetarian pizza onto the counter.

“I was about to go make sure you were still breathing,” Andrew said, not looking at Neil as he retrieved another plate from the cupboard.

“I’m alive,” Neil replied, watching the shorter man. “Just a little bruised.”

Andrew grunted in response and slid a plate with 2 slices of the pizza towards Neil. He kept his gaze on the floor as he leaned against the opposite counter and began working at his own plate. 

Neil watched him, more than a little smug. “So, just wondering- how intentional was the impromptu redecoration of my neck?” he asked in Russian.

Andrew finished chewing his bite. “More than I’m proud of.”

Neil huffed a bit. “I guess my neck must have been pretty ugly before then, huh?”

“Not ugly enough for the average college-aged activist, it seems,” Andrew responded, peeling a mushroom off with the pinch of two fingers. 

Neil stopped eating, putting his plate down beside him in order to cross his arms. “Message to granola guy then, huh?”

“Something like that,” Andrew replied, finally letting Neil catch his eye. “Just in case you suddenly felt the size of your carbon footprint and got behind one of those bake sale tables yourself.”

Neil smirked back at him. “Nah, I think I’m all filled up for the semester.”

Andrew hummed, taking another bite. “Maybe in the spring?” he added, muffled by the food in his mouth. 

Neil smiled and shook his head. “Only with your blessing, Drew.”

**Author's Note:**

> this was literally 37 pages but I hope it was fun to read :)


End file.
